artists life

i haven't been doing too much lately.  well not art related.  i have been blessed (she says with rancor) with lots of cleaning jobs the last few weeks and since i have allowed myself to fall into fear and poverty mode i've abandoned art to make some immediate cash.

this has been a rough time.  and i feel it will probably get rougher.  tod is gonna leave sometime this week (its a standby flight so it changes but it will be this week i'm sure) and then i really get to deal with my fear and panic and life all by myself once again.

right now i'm trying to deal with all my STUFF.  i have to laugh i guess. little in the way of personal stuff to get rid of, just art supplies, tools and art.  probably harder than unloading a living room sectional and bedroom set ya think?  i'm trying to decide what to keep in some unknowable anticipation of where i'm moving and when.  i did get a break on rent for summer but its will gonna be more than i've been making so i've decided to go for broke and try to sell all that i can in the next month or two.

i will open another etsy shop this week (its up but no banner or info):  industrial habitat.  this shop will contain industrial art supplies like pulleys and nuts/bolts other odd mixed media scraps, as well as industrial vintage items.

also, starting tonight i hope, i will begin uploading things on ebay.  some personal home items i just dont need as well as all my puzzle and photography wall art.  i will have to dismantle a few mixed media works that are just too big/heavy to ship and see if i can sell the photo's as stand alone works.  soon as that is up i will shout it out here if anyone is in the market for auctioned art or knows of someone who might love finding a deal!

so far i've not had any 'luck' finding another place/place.  at times i want to just get in my car and leave with nothing but my tent again but i wouldn't make it very far on so little cash.  it's too exhausting to think about how hard i've worked to find all my materials, buy tools, make art and get my foot in the door.  yet other times it feels too hard to keep juggling all of this and squeeze into a small living/work space that might or might not allow for using power tools.  my head is exploding with questions and it's not a good time to make decisions, just trying to take it day by day and deal with what is in front of me.  the cleaning jobs have distracted me and left me nearly dumb with fatigue. 

thats life in my nutshell. i know some of you really have been wondering what i'm doing and what is happening.  i appreciate your care and wanting to stay connected. thanks for being there!


andrea said...

Tough times for sure. It sounds like you need to move to a city -- but not an expensive one! - that has industrial warehouse space to rent. Not that you think it's an option for you, but apparently Berlin has been the place for artists for years now. The availability of cheap studio space on the east side of the city has attracted artists and generated a booming art culture (of the kind you'd like). There may even be Soviet 'bugs' left in the walls! :)

Missouri Bend Paper Works said...

Paula....remember that in the not-too-distant-future you will look back on this time as a stronger, wiser and happier woman. You will get through it, because obviously you have strength and stamina and the will to make wonderful things happen! We're all with you in spirit! P.

Teo said...

I think the idea to open a new shop is great! It's totally understandable that you don't feel like making art right now, so a new project might be just want you need to keep your mind busy. Less possessions and less strings might make you feel lighter. I have my fingers crossed for a good start and looking forward to seeing it open!

paula said...

berlin? haha i can't afford to move across the street right now. hahahahaha
thanks patti and teo, i'm looking forward to it all too.

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the update, Paula. I think of you every day.

andrea said...

Just sayin' and talking about other artists. I know it's your blog so never mind.

Cynthia said...

Like artistsjournal said, I think of you everyday, and I know many others do as well. This too shall pass...but unfortunately it's not going to hurry up and do that. Let me know how I can help!

donauluft said...

You are right, to take it day by day is the best way to handle it.
My experience is if you put something behind, something new will appear.
It is hard to decide too many things at one and the same time.
I think of you, Paula and wish you success with your selling initiatives !

paula said...

no biggie andrea, probably more interesting than i am right now!!
cynthia your friendship is priceless will let you know ♥
thanks too martha and viktoria, good energy being felt :)

pey said...

Miss P. sorry i've been wrapped up in my own little world of late, thinking of you non the less.
The new shop sounds very promising.
Will do my best to spread the word for you.