10/10/09

somehow

funny, i realize there are some people who would love to know how its going, whats going, when its going. gone. i can't for the life of me summons the oomph to entertain. the day in and day out banalities of packing for a move are not interesting unless you strain a brain cell and try.

in a more reflective, somber sort of way i can already see that this is really what we are supposed to be doing. tod mentioned yesterday how little resistance we have had. and i agree. seems like from day one, living here has been a blessing and, for lack of better word, curse. i say that lightly. i forget what its called, but this house was specifically built on this land because of the energy field. its a place of no energy and its like having the RESET button pushed every day. i'm not making this up. its a real thing, kind of like the burmuda triangle....

anyhow. the deal is, you live here and soak that up and its like ground hog day. it begins anew over and over. how i managed to make art here is a miracle because god knows nothing else ever got done here. people come here to rest. heal. save marriages. SERIOUSLY. this isn't a place to LIVE day in and day out.

i've never experienced anything like it.

so when tod mentioned 'little resistance' i knew what he meant. the fact that no visitors have come (which for this time of year is freaky) and we have blessedly been left alone so we can make messes and do what needs to be done is astounding! Not only that, normally NOTHING ever gets done when its supposed to. that goes for the constant non showing up of workers when things break (tod did most repairs but the big things were contracted out). the phone lines that since the day i moved in 5 years ago, have rendered the phones unusable with buzzing and static no matter that new lines were put up all over town and up our mountain road, no matter the numerous experts who have come here to fix the problem. no matter what we mere mortals have tried, things just never work right. we've had a list of things that needed to get done before we left and suddenly everything is magically getting fixed. no matter the refrigerator guy has been here off and on for 3+ months trying to fix a 10,000 machine that beeps at all hours of the night. its fixed now. no matter that no painters would call or show up to repaint the garage door panels that needed replaced. tomorrow they will be done. no matter that many tedious things are all lining up and while our plates are overflowing at least they are being cleaned one by one. oh, and the phone....quiet as the night.

somehow tod will sell that van in the next 4 days. somehow he will manage to get rid of that monster float tank in the basement. somehow considering we know NO ONE who can help us move my TON of art materials, we have found two men who we can pay to help. and i have to believe that i got rid of just enough to somehow get all that stuff stuffed into a moving truck. so far my eyes aren't twitching with nerves. somehow in this horrible economy tod saved just enough money to enable us this journey. somehow i will sell enough art to pay him back and be able to pay my half of the new bills we will have.

timing is everything. we knew we were moving yet nothing felt right. a blogger innocently sent me that NY Times article on Dan Phillips and a few weeks later it hit us smack dab in the face that THAT is IT. the brain wants to say why we shouldn't do this. but the heart beats louder and leads the way.

6 comments:

Dawn of LaTouchables said...

A total inspiration, and your writing is so flawless and flowing--incredible stuff you have written!

Angela Recada said...

Isn't it something, how things fall together when they are meant to be.

No need to entertain us. Just be yourself. Drop by to tell us how you and Tod are doing once in a while.
:0)

Daphne Enns said...

Interesting post. It's interesting about the energy of the place and how things have started to piece themselves together like one of your puzzles. I'm glad that you're leaving this place. It is clearly meant to happen to and for you, but somewhere else!

Ellen said...

What a contrast this move will be. Energy is so important though. And from own experience when I go against my intuition (my heart)I know I'm not having the rich life experience I could be having. I've said it before, but I'll say it again, good for you for having the courage to do this, what an exciting journey.

self taught artist said...

hey dawn...glad it makes sense, i think i write such improper jibberish.
yep angela i will keep in touch!!
mz D i love that you had a puzzle analogy :)
elle, yes it really will be a contrast wont it. and so true about intuition. it is feeling more and more exciting!

Chris said...

Sheesh! The day is coming so soon! Say good bye before you leave!