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Showing posts from October, 2009

its a challenge

i have to say, today as most days, has been hard. good hard. hard hard. hate hard. i knew i would be out of my comfort zone. i didn't really know WHAT to expect, what i would be doing or how life would unfold so i am not really complaining. hard is okay, just uncomfortable. nothing i'm not used to.

the days zip by and i'm still completely baffled. i have no routine and nothing is where i'm used to it being (ie in boxes or scattered all about). tod and i are constantly walking around our loft over and over as if stricken with alzheimer's, looking for one thing finding another and forgetting what we originally needed. as a semi autistic obsessive type, not knowing where my things are splits my head down the center. as an artist i'm overwhelmed. i had imagined i would somehow be making 'my' art again and now i know that isn't going to be the case. there just isn't the room or time. and i'm okay with it most of the time....sometimes i …

im so bad

i should be posting pictures of the job site, of my life here in huntsville right? instead i'm posting my favorite things, scrappy things. tod and i stopped at rest areas for gas/pee/walk breaks and that was IT. at once place i saw these locks and while i only had my smaller pixel camera, had to take a few pictures. kind of bothers me that i dont know when or if i will ever find a printer i like who gets me and can match my previous images....and i doubt i will be sending anything off to canada anytime for laminations/mixed media pieces. that was all done for me in stowe and at cost, there is no way i can afford it myself right now.

so what am i doing? what have i been doing? god only knows. chaos people. a life turned inside out, upside down and still churning in the butter wheel. i couldn't take it today and got a 5x10 storage unit, our loft smells of cardboard. we have had a shitload of rain, 'a real frog floater' as its called. torrents. non stop an enti…

quick update from the library


enclosed room (bedroom)

one side of our kitchen

other side kitchen

who needs to actually shower to WAKE UP????

living area

my kind of ceiling

more living area (kitchen is on other side of that open window area

my work room adjacent to bedroom separated by a large space

outside view of my art work space. front door on right

view from front door. bedroom on left my work room on right

our bedroom

i LOVE how our lives have been since settling in! i live a two minute walk, yes a TWO MINUTE walk from the library. HEAVEN. we live 1 mile from one of the work sites of the 'bone house' that is almost completed by dan's crew. already we have permission to use some wood and make some shelves which we did yesterday. it was surreal to think that just two months ago we were in stowe and nellie sent that email with the ny times links about danphillips and now we are here and already learning how to use a nail air gun and i got shown a better way to use a miter/chop saw.

dan has let me store…

another hurdle cleared

i'm not sure who really wants to hear the details of how we found a place, it was nothing short of miraculous. as was the unpacking of the truck by dan's crew. seven of us moving faster than ants carrying large loads. will write more later....hopefully will get internet soon but after we leave our little cluttered econolodge room this morning thats it unless we find library time. suffice to say there is a ton of work to do trying to fight my way through the crazily packed boxes and hurry up and make this place livable so we can get to work with dan soon.

i have to say the one thing i hate is those damn 'palmetto bugs' which is just a nice way of saying 2 inch shit filled cockroaches. i've already seen their dead dry corpses in every place we've looked to live. there is no avoiding them. i remember them from arizona....such dreaded grotesque things. you find them in the middle of the night on the tip of your toothbrush. they are anywhere and everywhere and i saw …

false starts and looking at beginnings

i'm a little used to blowing into a town and finding a place to live and making a temporary life. but this time it is different as there is all my art in that truck outside the econo lodge room we are in. the truck is due tomorrow at 3 and we dont have a place to live. the $100 day late fee for the return appears inevitable. we can handle that i guess, we have to eh?

today was a whirlwind. we only looked at three houses yesterday and one commercial unit in town and we were going to go for one of the homes (which was out of town). it was a 3 bedroom with a garage (a rarity it seems). no fridge. no washer or dryer. we'd be responsible for a huge ass yard but basically be out away from people and free to make noise. something seemed right something didn't but we realized we had no choice as the only other house we've seen was nastier and no place for my tools let alone storing stuff.

this being texas 'n all, we were presented with a HUGEOID lease that when we …

where do i belong

this picture was taken outside of my days inn motel (which was vile by the way), i believe it was in TN. i realized once i hit south that i was more of an outsider than even in vermont. little things, like people taking double looks at you when you open your mouth to speak....or me asking over and over at each stop if they sold heavy cream and being given the most questionable of looks. milk? you mean milk?

little things give you comfort when you are out of your element. i've not found comfort. i can't say i have ever even felt like this. i dont feel. i dont feel scared, i dont feel sick, i dont feel excited. i feel numb. i have a headache from the heat, standing out in it, driving in it. looking for a place to live in a relatively good sized college city and there are NO homes for rent. a few trailers. town houses. apartments. the only two homes for rent right now are both 7-10 miles away, which kind of bums me out because i've lived away from it all and i w…

fri morning catch up shots

no room for this clock ANYWHERE in the truck so it got the primo front seat. covered it up with a blanky and filled up that empty floor space and got every last drop of earthly possessions in!

stuffed and ready to go FINALLY....

getting the car attached to the dolly (exciting isnt it?)

texas here we come.......

and now, monday morning we are here. haven't had time to get online until now. and now we have to get our butts out there and find us a place to live. more later, just letting everyone know we made it with no problems and only one panic attack!

is it something i packed?

*updated at the end

wow even in the picture i can see the truck leaning to the left....just as its doing in real life. and look...its after 6pm and we were going to be on the road at noon. and where am i? why i'm sitting on my recently mopped empty living room floor.

we of course didn't get everything done in time. yesterday was amazing..a guy i happened upon down the mountain said he would help pack the truck (i offered to pay $15 an hour). he came, as well as a friend i haven't even seen in a few years (i worked for her briefly when i was a massage therapist at the green mtn inn a few months). this guy used to work for allied vans and he knew what he was doing. he single handedly packed this thing like some sort of savant. tod and i added a few things today and used those cratey things you see to cover some pointy ends, gives it that beverly hillbillies look dont you think?

so yesterday was beyond any of my wildest imaginations of how easy it could be. the truck …

d day

i've lived here in vermont exactly five years and it hasn't ever snowed until a few days to thanksgiving. guess what i woke up to? granted its just a ground covering...just enough to be mischievous as i think about our now foiled plans to drive the truck round back to our basement french doors and move things without having to walk up stairs. shit. its a wintry day...all gray and misty with a slight sleety slush. more tonight. just let us get out of here without making a muddy mess of boxes/home and lawn!

down to the wire with tod's van selling. there is hope and worse comes to worse maybe he can leave it with his now 'ex' boss. the caretaker down the road is lined up to help us move AND take over minimal duties here, so if the float tank doesn't magically float away another good chance it can stay here and hide out for awhile longer.

last night was the first up for hours in the wee hours pushing back imagined worries. i always worry about my own mind. …


funny, i realize there are some people who would love to know how its going, whats going, when its going. gone. i can't for the life of me summons the oomph to entertain. the day in and day out banalities of packing for a move are not interesting unless you strain a brain cell and try.

in a more reflective, somber sort of way i can already see that this is really what we are supposed to be doing. tod mentioned yesterday how little resistance we have had. and i agree. seems like from day one, living here has been a blessing and, for lack of better word, curse. i say that lightly. i forget what its called, but this house was specifically built on this land because of the energy field. its a place of no energy and its like having the RESET button pushed every day. i'm not making this up. its a real thing, kind of like the burmuda triangle....

anyhow. the deal is, you live here and soak that up and its like ground hog day. it begins anew over and over. how i managed to…

inkling of excitement

alrighty. the car has been fixed. the teeth are as good as they are gonna get until i wanna come up with another grand for a new crown. no cavities so i wont complain. last order of bubble wrap arrived today in yet another rainy cold windy nasty day. i can finish packing.

i cannot wait to get to humid hot texas. i know it wont be like arizona at all, but at least i'm closer to the desert. i think i'm done with winters, east coast and midwest style. you can have your four seasons...i feel like it shortens my life span. time goes by too fast and the weather always messes with everything. no more. after this texas stint, which could be anywhere from 6 months to two years we have no real clue where to go but you can bet your sweet ass it isn't going to be in sub zero atmospheres. we say portland but its silly to project right now, and i'm so sick of rain i can't think about it right now. lets just focus on getting settled and learning and working on art ag…


yesterday a woman was seen jumping off of the golden gate bridge. she had tied many coffee mugs around her waist, perplexing authorities about who she was and why more than 50 coffee mugs were attached to her. according to eyewitnesses, she had last been seen living under a bridge in a tent.

eyewitnesses say the coffee mugs made an incredible clanging noise as they hit each other and the victims own head. many of the mugs shattered but a few were still intact upon the victims dissension into the water. it is reported that a nearby fishing boat was seen paddling towards the body and actually stealing some of the mugs. the coast guard shooed them away upon arriving at the scene.

authorities were able to locate the victims next of kin after posting a few of the mugs on the national news, apparently there was a trail of mugs left all throughout the northeast as well as canada and alaska. people recognized them and phoned in with information regarding a woman known to have been …


not sure why i feel so mute lately. i know if tod and i were going to portland, oregon we would be looking at all the things to do and places to look at art, walk, ride bikes etc. i'd be searching neighborhoods and getting excited.

now that we are for sure going to huntsville, tx to work as volunteers I'm baffled. i try not to imagine too much because that is when I get a little sick feeling. i know i will be living working in whatever home we find to rent. it has to be a cheap home with no carpet and a place i can somehow set up outdoor prep space for cutting wood and metal. will it be safe? will i bug neighbors? i have a long list of concerns.

every time we sit down on a sofa or i go to sleep at night i think, wow, soon we wont have sofa's and mattresses. no tables or desks. since we aren't sure it will work out and we might not live there more than 6 months AND need to save money in case we move on, buying stuff, even cheap stuff wont be an option unless des…

two more weeks

In two weeks exactly we plan on leaving. I've not had the time or desire to search or think or plan. Now that my september art sale is done I can focus everything on packing and cleaning. We are having perfect weather: cold, rainy, chance of snow. So no distraction with wanting to play wiffle ball, go for long hikes or dealing with all the mowing.

I marvel at how it has been the most quiet here that I can remember for this time of year. We have pretty much been left alone, few visitors staying at the house, to my amazement, even the gardener has become a ghost of herself . The days zip by faster than ever and there really isn't much to think or talk about. So my blog gets a rest from my rants. And I hope that when I get to Texas my life opens up and while I know I will have challenges, I hope I no longer have the same frustrations and road blocks that I've experienced here. I know nothing is ever perfect but I find it hard to complain right now when I'm gettin…