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Showing posts from August, 2008

gearing up to print

So I've been looking through the old photo shoots for possible pics to use in future mixed media pieces. I have taken a fair amount of pictures, and like this one, aren't really usable but I like anyhow. After finding out yesterday that my photo lab dude is gone I will admit to being freaked out a bit. I had a good working relationship with him. He didn't judge my work, he came to an opening I was featured in at the big gallery once just for moral support. He has gone over and over things with me that for some reason just don't stick in my head. I felt safe there.

This new guy is a professional photographer with a more than healthy dose of confidence. Maybe it wont be as bad as I am imagining. His set up is a lot different, the place is seemingly more of a gallery than it is a photo lab. He has one little area for that and an entire gallery space for his and others' photography. I'm used to going in and putting my work in these little computers and choo…

Dual Time

Dual Time

I have been wanting to make a dual time piece for awhile now. I originally thought I would use two RR Plates and one would have the minute and the other the hour hand. I like this better, two for the price of one. While not everyone might appreciate auto parts, lately I have been looking for, finding, and LOVING plastic. Hard black plastic. Suddenly I am seeing it everywhere and have been collecting with fervor.

After yesterdays' post. After the comments. I'm a bit more slapped in the face and woken up: ready to walk forward. Thank you guys for being supportive. For as minute as it might seem, just having peers care enough(?) be interested enough(?) is helpful. I have to keep in mind I am me. I'm not like everyone else. I'm in the middle of 'it' whatever it is and it is my journey and I'm supposed to figure out how to travel it. I know that, but sometimes I don't want to be alone.

Supply and demand. Yesterday the gallery in s…

now what

Scattered Time #74/100

This is the clock that has been on the drawing board for awhile, I just finished putting it together. I should be happy. HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY

I'm grouchy. I still feel that I am a wick. I am doused with flammable liquid. But no one is striking the match. I keep looking outside of myself. The motivation. The spirit. I need to know that there is a point in making art. I know there are lessons. I know it soothes my soul. One would think that that is enough. One would think I would be so grateful to be in a few galleries here. One would think I would look at my 'solds' and feel such a sense of accomplishment.

A show comes up, I put work in. I sell. I see an ooh and ahh. And then it's over. The work is in there. I'm here. I don't get to see/feel/hear whats going on.

What the hell do I want anyways?

Sometimes I know it is good to know what you 'think' you want. It helps, if anything to pretend and be…

black cloud and the moral of the story

I'm going to make art if it kills me.
Those were my words to Tod when he left for work yesterday. And I did in fact stay in my studio working on something. Granted it was a clock, already put together over a month ago design wise, I spent the better part of the afternoon making it into reality. I think it helped me feel in touch again.

I realize from the post below people might think I have fallen into a black hole because I wasn't feeling creative. That isn't the case (I'm not creative but it isn't the reason for the ick). I was just in a black hole, that makes me not feel creative. That makes me even more dismal. The culprit of my pointlessness was more car issues, realizations that this whole work thing, money thing, art thing is one big long slow process and having more people come stay here (which inhibits my ability to scream and be loud and goofy) all combined into one big paralyzed ball of muck.

There is also the one factor that I have yet to figure out…
That is where I'm at.
Oh I wish I were posting new art. Discussing new this and that. Unfortunately I have not one iota of creativity residing in me.
So for whoever cares, for whoever wonders what the great artist is up to, I share with you my nothingness.
I fell into the crack, the large gaping cesspool crevice in my own head and am swimming in blackness.

in a flash

And so 2 hours later I leave the little, tiny. HOT, SUFFOCATING frame shop.
God help me.

The woman is so nice, SO nice. Had me come in today just to show me around and have me play with the glass and matt cutter. I remember doing some of that the little bit I worked during my winter stay in MN. Probably will go in another time this week just to watch and then decide. I've kind of decided I might not be able to deal with the space. While I am not in full blown menopause, I'm finding more and more that I get flashy, one long HOT when I'm nervous and trapped. I felt like passing out. A little fan was on the floor but it's a frame shop, you can't have shit blowing all over everything.

It's times like today I suddenly feel like a total loser again. All my hope and belief goes out the window and suddenly I think I'm just destined to be poor. Or I think might as well drive the cab at least I can cool off when I drive. I'll say this, it makes me want to …


Looks like I will find out this Sunday about that frame shop job, I'm going in to hang out and find out whats what. In the meantime, I'm still doing pretty much nothing. Reading, napping. That is about it. I see this pattern of making a chunk of art, especially when it is gallery due, and after the opening and the buzz I tend to feel completely lost. I can't imagine ever making art again but I know that will pass. I might even try to do something and it always turns into some awful clump of BAD. It doesn't bother me like it used to. I know it is just how the cycle runs. And when this house is full I tend to surrender more and more, which = rest.

It would be easy to say I would do more if my car were up to snuff and gas felt manageable. But truth is, it is nice to not have to be busy all day. I still tend to slip into poverty mode though. In all aspects of my life. The thought poverty of I will never find more scrap that is cool. I will never find things t…

Money. MoneyMoneyMoneyMoney

Well it was worth the effort to redo this piece, the guy bought it.

I'm having an interesting time when it comes to money. A brief recap would show that in my late teens I made, this was in the late 70's, easily 300+ a week. Back then McDonald's let you work overtime. I would do 80 hr weeks sometimes. Yep, I lived there. I got promoted often and by the time I was 19 yr old I had keys to the joint, closed the joint, took the daily payroll to the bank. My future was bright if I wanted to live in polyester forever.

Then the harder years...the going out on my own, leaving the Midwest and going full on west. I made less, drank more and never had a dime. I was stupid with money.

The massage therapist years were profitable but I also pissed that away until the very end when I got serious about saving money. It was just enough to, unbeknownst to me, allow me to one day quit and fling myself back out into the unknown.

I've somehow scraped by since becoming an artist and li…

Screws 101

This morning I started googling broken screws. Screw grades. All about the screw. And I am happy to report that, unless I am not understanding this correctly, that it isn't that I need a better more expensive screw, I just need to do a better job when working with hard wood. I found some useful information on a woodworking site:

To make screwing easier and prevent wood splitting and screw breakage, wax your screws before driving them. Drag the threads across a chunk of paraffin or an old candle to lubricate them. Avoid using soap, though; it can cause steel screws to rust.

They also talk about making the proper pilot holes, which I did do but now I see I could have done better. This is exciting, while I haven't been breaking screws very often, when I do it is usually close to catastrophic since the piece is usually mostly assembled and it's too late to turn back. If I cannot replace the wood because it is already affixed to the photograph or whatever object I've sta…


Dropped off the redo piece (below) to the Gallery in Montpelier and when I went into the owners studio to see his current works in progress my eyeball caught site of this big ole bag of wood chips/sawdust type stuff. 'What ya gonna do with that?', I hadda ask. 'Why? Ya want it?'....'Uh yeah'. He wondered what I was going to do with it. Hell I don't have a clue. All I know is I was attracted to it. That's the fun part of being an artist, seeing whats out there and tuning in to what tickles your fancy. Could be soon, could be a year, but I will use those. Maybe not the whole bag, the point is to feel excited and challenged by something, I can't tell you how satisfying it is to just look at this bag filled with soft buttery wood shavings.

the Evolution of Evolution

Before After

Today, after shedding tears of frustration because of how frickin hard this was to put together, I finally finished it. This is similar to the one that just went into the gallery on a smaller scale. The difference is I used pipes (the center pipe is not as wide or large as the top and bottom pipe) and the horizontal pipe is one pipe. On the large piece (see below) I used flat pieces of steel, all of which were placed in uneven ways. For anyone mildly interested in why this was so hard, it was mostly because the pipes were different sizes and that changed the dynamics of where to drill holes and how to place the piece inside of the band, it wasn't until I started mounting each pipe to the back of the photograph and lining them up with the holes I found out I was off, I didn't take into account the flex still in the band and how it would move once two sides were affixed. Even if I had the knowledge of this I wouldn't have any better idea how to physically mak…

no more weeds for me

.............and just like that, it's over.
told to stop at a certain point at the driveway. no more weed pulling for this wenchola. budget, over budget. nix the driveway worker first ya know, who's going to sit around and marvel at their driveway after all? Although I am beginning to take a sick amount of pride in my weed pulling skills and tend to stand a bit too long in a daze staring at the weed free gravel. I take pride in my work after all.

and none too soon.
I'm so tired, bone tired. which I think explains why in my afternoon nap I dreamt I was a poor little blind, black girl. I was being tortured by mean kids in school and waiting to be picked up by some family that was adopting me. It started in the bathroom, being tortured, and when I finally escaped and felt my way down the hallway walls outside I was then pounced on my two more jerky kids.

if I can shake this tired off I'm gonna work on art.

you weed puller

I'm a weed puller extraordinaire. Were it not for rain, I'm sure by Fri I would have easily surpassed 40 hours. FORTY HOURS. I pulled weeds for nine hour Tuesday and worked every day this week even in the pouring rain. I guess its a big weekend here and well, you can't have weeds in your driveway can you?

I am the low man on the totem pole and that is fine by me. Yes I do what the other gardeners (I don't even call myself that because I'm not) are probably relieved not to have to do if at all possible. After all, who wants a butt full of bruises from sitting on sharp pointy rocks all day? They are colorful so I don't mind so much. Yesterday Tod suggested I find a kneeling pad and we instead found a thin rubbery sled thing in the basement for me to use. Now I'm just inundated with mosquito and ant bites. The other gardeners are probably the nicest bunch of gals I've ever come across. While I'm still in outsider feeling mode, at least they t…

West Branch Gallery & Sculpture Park in Stowe, VT.

As promised, some pictures of the expanded gallery and artwork from last nights' opening:

So these three round ones are mine. Another dark rainy day and they didn't have all the lights on. Another excuse for not so great pictures. It isn't easy taking indoors photographs.

This center sculpture is by Chris Curtis (it is his and his wife Tari'sgallery) The entire room has been created from a once long, rather useless hall/entry way. They are still going to remove a wall and make a curved opening so you can also see the front doors/window area that is down another hall area. His piece is in the middle so I kind of took an all around view of the room.

And to the left of the photo above is a door and a large glass garage type door that is open during nice weather and leads out to a beautiful patio and sculpture garden. It started raining when I got there so I couldn't go out and get photos. Glare from the windows kept me from shooting a picture of that side.

SOLD & other Marvelousness

So last night was the opening at West Branch Gallery & Sculpture Park in Stowe. It is the first opening I've been to this year since I actually had work to show for a change. It is the first opening with their new big expanded insides that has doubled the interior exhibiting space AND it is the first opening that I've gone to and seen a little red dot next to a piece. While it did not sell that evening, it did sell that afternoon (i've always had this fantasy of selling a piece on opening night)

The wonder horse was up but not the close up head shot; they ended up putting evolution and wonder horse vertical to each other on its own painted panel. Evolution POPPED out. The horse was below it and not as stunning of a view. This piece (the photo) Phylogenesis was the one with the red dot. The cool thing is, I have my first repeat buyer! Last year he bought Fly Away. (another horrible white balance photo of the original work, I need to stop that) He isn't even s…

the bloggin

Yesterday I had a blog friend tell me she gets 50,000 blog hits a month. Last month I had another blogger tell me she gets a butt load of visitors as well. I'm thinking I must be missing the mark, last time I checked I had 19 visitors yesterday. My biggest day was 36.

My little blog has been useful for me both on an emotional level and an artistic one. It served well in the beginning, seemed my unstable state of mind and life was more interesting than my current less stressed one is now. Back then people visited often and I sold some art. Sometimes I can't help but to want to ask 'is it me? am i boring now?' The art is still good, if not better, but I'm not in throws of angst and whatever else.

I know I get less visitors now because I removed myself from blog catalogue. After a blogger from there was stealing my and everyone else's blogs to use for an ad blog, after realizing that I got more invites to be a friend than I ever have in my real life...after…