I can't know what other artists go through, but I have to wonder if they don't experience similar phases when it comes to growth and stuckness. Sometimes it feels like I could do anything and succeed, and then there are periods of complete feelings of failure. I understand there is this stretching of self, you push yourself and do something that is just a little beyond what you normally do and then realize you've gone outside of your line and wonder what you are doing 'out there'.
I'm feeling it now. The last dozen clocks I have made have crossed some sort of line and now I'm floundering. The commission job is also making me uneasy. I have the ideas just don't have the skills or tools or knowledge. I can't learn it all and I can't do it all. So what do I do? What if I have ideas that supersede my abilities? Once you realize you've pushed yourself further in some way it makes it painful to go back to doing things the way you were if that makes sense.
The challenge is to not freak out. It is staggering if I sit down and let my mind go to all the things I think I want to do and realize I have caveman tools and a matching brain. I'm not in a position to hire someone to do things for me, here and there yes but for anything big or extensive I'm pretty much in fantasy land. I guess this is where patience, acceptance and fortitude come into play. I have to observe with animal awareness what is going on, what I want, where I want to go and hope I catch a scent. I suppose if I could have any wish come true it would be that a person would appear that had fantastic assemblage skills and was happy just working for someone (me) else. I could design works and discuss it with this person and together we could make it. I kind of don't want to learn EVERYTHING ya know? I don't want to learn how every tool works and weld/cut/measure/fabricate everything.
I have to figure it out I guess. Put on my superhuman outfit and see if I can fling myself to the next level. It scares me and makes me terribly uncomfortable but growth rarely happens when you stay all safe and comfy. It's my choice, like it or not.
Thanks flowkradd for allowing me to use your image!