why bother

For the few of you who have subscribed to my blog you got to see my post today with my finished piece, for those of you who didn't then you can go to my website and look under most recent works if you are interested. I deleted it as a blog post because it felt exposed to scrutiny and I'm not in the mood for it.

I'm having a bad day. The gallery was thick with grouch energy when I dropped the piece off...what is fun about anything of this? My work at the photo shop seems to be held hostage, he is grouchy and instead of the bantering and friendly hellos I was ignored; I've wanted my pen and ink drawing scanned and it's been two weeks now...normally work is finished in a day or so, I made the mistake of calling and apparently bugging him. I've waited a week since the call and it's still not done. I keep thinking: one piece at a time. Is this how I'm going to live?

I work my ass off ~ drive myself crazy and spend every damn dime I have to make art. Who cares and why am I bothering is how I feel today. No entertaining verbally delicious blogging from me today. I wish I could give up, but I think if I did I would just fade away.


kate said...

I'm going to check out your website. I missed your post of earlier. I hate when people are grouchy... grr negative energy. Then I tell myself that maybe their lives aren't great and that something's happened that day and then it lets me not let them have a bad effect on me.

kate said...

I went and looked at your new piece and I think it is wonderful. Good work!

self taught artist said...

thanks for looking!

self taught artist said...

and you are right, when i am not being so self absorbed i too realize it isn't about me, that people usually react the way they do because of them not me. i guess two people in a row being grouchy knocked me for a loop