Last night I took the commissioned piece to the people. It was a birthday present so I went out and got wrapping paper and wrapped it up. How fun is that to get for a birthday present???? The guy was completely unaware of this gift, and he is, I believe an avid art connoisseur. Their home has fantastic art from all over the world (and not in a decadent grotesque way)so it was thrilling for me to maybe have my art be a part of it all. I explained the piece and the whys and hows and then let him open it. Neither the wife who commissioned me to make this or the gallery owner had seen the piece (he was there too) and it was fun to observe their reactions.
We took it outside to hang it where she had in mind for it go to. They really liked it and thought the time capsule and Chinese characters were great. The 'stuffing' of the flashing with all of those bike spokes....it all really worked and I loved how it looked on the house. I honestly had more confidence about it because of posting it here last week and getting great feedback from you guys...so thanks for helping me! So, the piece sold and now it is on to the next thing.
I'm sounding all cheery here but there are things that happen under the surface that aren't always pleasant. I don't feel the need to talk about it right now, maybe some day I will when I'm not so close to it. I need to focus on the fact I sold the piece as well as three of my clocks this week and the new design store out of town took two more of my mixed media photography pieces and has given me great feedback about my work from customers. No sales yet, but at least people are seeing it and responding to it.
The icing on the cake is, a dear friend of mine sent me a check today as a down payment on a piece yet to be decided for the future. It is his way of helping to support me as an artist since he knows I've hit a wall with money. I was shocked and humbled. Earlier this week I had my first day as a taxi driver, hated it and quit and had all this fear about making the wrong decision but something in me just doesn't believe I'm supposed to suffer any more than I already make myself. I know I will probably have to work at some point as a last resort, but right now it feels so wrong and I have to pay attention to that.
I've had interesting conversations and thoughts with people about money. I wonder why it is that with no money I personally have little to no confidence. Why do I perceive someone with money (I'm talking rich people not the average joe) as superior? I know I was brought up by depression babies. My parents also seemed to have this fear and loathing of money and anyone with money. I resent money. I'm afraid of money. But I want money. How can there be harmony with all of that schizoid energy?