upsidedown

Remember last week me asking people if I should go for this piece? Yesterday I finally did finish it, then I saw it was crooked AND I put it upside down. I liked it until I saw the other one. I disassembled it and it will sit until I decide which view I like best. If you have a thought feel free to say which you prefer. Sorry for the drastic color difference, natural light vs fluorescent light and impatient camera settings.

I think I will get to work on my table idea while this marinates.

michigan, seattle, stowe, sanity

after days of re-researching the michigan thing, tod came up with some stats. that sort of stopped any fantasies about moving to detroit right now. true, we could get a foreclosed home for 50k (lets not think about the loan or how we prove we even have incomes) that has everything and needs no work. we could get a foreclosed home for $100 or 5,000....all would need work. Lets just say we did it. Tod found out that something like 75% of high school students dont even graduate. I googled the population: there is about 830,000 - 820,000 people left in a city compared to 916,952 in 2008, with more people moving out as i speak. a whopping 1/3 of the population lives BELOW the poverty line. i googled parks and bike paths and could only find a sad bragging about them recently (this was last year or so?) getting 1.5 miles of bike paths in downtown. I couldn't find any places that were set up for walking.....instead I read that in all of detroit only 30% of it is even remotely safe to walk in during the day. that killed it for me. if i'm going to live in a shit hole and be poor i want to at least walk everywhere and not be marooned on my housing lot. i'd go nuts. forget about finding like minded people. other than the few brave artist types there, what business would i have living there? culturally i might go into shock. i dont think i would thrive in a city with high crime, poverty and poor education stats.

so seattle. we finally felt good about deciding to go there. foreclosed homes there? 179k - 300k UNBELIEVABLE. its still one of the richest cities in a shaky economy. our chance to move there would happen IF my sister decided to go live abroad. IF we could come up with a min. of 1300-1500 a month not including utilities. (i've deleted this next bit because I realize its just a rant that doesn't need to be put out there)

i think maybe i'm just kidding myself. if you have no money and no job skills (going back to massage therapy isn't an option as i let my license expire and my body just cannot do that anymore) wtf do you do? go find new people to care take for? suddenly everything here looks PERFECT.(more rant deletion, sorry)

wheres waldo. thats what i feel like i'm looking for in a plethora of locked doors. i'm looking for that one place that has room for me and tod and my art. a place i dont have to go to three separate areas to get my stuff and work on. a place that is vibrant and 'green minded' and cultural.

Paula Art on Etsy

I've decided to make a separate blog that showcases the treasuries, favorites, new items and anything else etsy related. Hope some of you stop by, I kind of like the treasury thing, it is a creative challenge :) I've got one ready for next week that is all paintings of swimmers. I figure you gotta try something and if I want to be moving or whatever it is I'm trying to do maybe I can derive a little more business from etsy if I just work at it more. And if not, I'm sure I will continue to meet some good people.

etsy treasury #2

It Felt Natural
(treasury expires monday so the link wont work after that)

I'm posting my 2nd treasury I made in etsy to impress upon us all how people can change [myself especially]. For those of you who have been reading my blog the last year or so, you know I've been extremely challenged with warming up to this whole etsy thing. For newcomers, I will admit I'm not proud of my acerbic attitude. I have somehow managed to push all that out of my way and try to focus on what is really wonderful about this site.

For one, my work looks and feels slicker there than on my own website. Two, being a little more involved in the treasury process has warmed me up by dint of meeting a few really wonderful people. There are some unbelievably smart women out there and I've already learned a few things that I personally think are cool. I'll share, but first just look at the treasury :) I call it: 'It felt natural'. These works are all felt!!!! I can honestly say I truly like every item I put in that treasury. I only had to pour through about 183 pages to find this stuff....it took me 3 days to make it and while I of course berated myself for spending so much time on something that isn't related to my art or my life, I enjoyed doing it. You know what, if one has to have a diversion at least highlighting others feels like a 2nd best way to spend time. While I still have not sold to a stranger, I think even those who knew me and bought via etsy found it perhaps easier and possibly more fun that way and it was easier on my end having the transaction handled through them AND the feedback stuff is out there for people who need to see it.

So for other less than savvy people, here are the 3 things I learned:

1) there is a treasury west as well as the regular treasury. treasury west appears to be a 'test' so it may not be around permanently, but it is another way 'in' if the other treasury is all filled up.

2) craftopolis. (i don't even mind the name....who cares right?) Great way to find out if you are in a treasury either as a highlight or an alternative. to me it's important to thank people who took the time to put your work in a treasury and not everyone tells you via a 'convo' (conversation in case you aren't familiar)

3) heartomatic. stat freak? want to know what items have been viewed or favorited? this is faster and easier than going to your etsy site and checking. great way, again, to check out people who like what you do and see what they do.

There you have it. Another day. Moving forward through the sludge. I don't feel any better than I did yesterday but your comments yesterday really made me feel like someone shown some light in my little hell hole.

poll

do you think if an artist is a complete idiot in the business world, has no money and few friends or contacts they have a chance in hell? i've come to the hideous conclusion i'm probably up the creek.

in my day to day life it has been shown over and over i'm incompetent in most any dealings with others. in my own art making i often take days to do something someone who is logical and able minded would do in minutes.

is it common for artists to feel each and every day that they cannot take it another day? that almost everything about their life is unbearable? that they can't even imagine another option or way to live? this is why i prefer to stick my head in the sand and just make art and not think. but that has gotten me no where and i wont have that luxury much longer. i wouldn't be so pissed if art making wasn't so important to me. pissed at myself for being so damn stupid.

its a puzzle

....where to live that is. I have no reason to blog about this stuff other than bouncing it off of something other than the inside of my head (and tod's). who knows...maybe an idea will come to fruition from some happenstance comment.

we have outgrown this care taking situation. we could keep living here but the suffocation process has begun and the oxygen depletion is showing. we are stagnating. which brings me to the questions that plague me constantly.

first, where to live. there is the thought that one should live near a city that is an art mecca of sorts. in the city is fine too but then costs and space are an issue. were i a small scale worker it wouldn't be a problem. i need at least 1000 sq feet for my supplies/tools work space. even then, i need a separate area to cut metal and wood. renting a studio and a living space seem expensive and not fruitful to how i work as an artist.

if we move midwest, south or west would i be able to find the plethora of barn/farm free scrappy stuff that i use? i know the midwest has that but i hate living there, i grew up there and i'm over it. i need mountains in my life. i need people that are educated, not obsessed with religion, not obsessed with how beautiful their kids are and how expensive their this and that is. real people. people who accept each other and dont stare you down with looks of hate, anger or superiority. that doesn't exist here which is a huge plus, but it isn't enough. another plus is vermont has a population of about 600,000, its a small state both geographically and population wise. there is lots of land and tons of supplies, more than i could ever gather. but the snow thing and the job thing (for tod mostly) and the art thing aren't really ideal. i guess if i were wealthy and could have my own studio space and place to live and not care i wouldn't care, but that isn't the reality.

there could be a possible opportunity next year to live in seattle but the house situation isn't ideal. i would be stuck in another basement and honestly, i feel like i can't stand living underground anymore. and it wouldn't be my place, yet again i would have no freedom, even less than i have here actually. in a way [here] they dont care how we decorate our space but this possible place in seattle i wouldn't even be able to put a nail up to hang art where i want. i think as an artist, the more space i get to play with and use the better. i'm more interested in how i can make space artistically functional than just making a piece of art to go on a wall. sometimes beggars can't be choosers though and if nothing else comes to the forefront who knows. seattle is a great place...although again, a basement work life and months of dreary aren't really ideal for my mental health.

yeah we could probably find a foreclosed house in a bad neighborhood and spend all of our time fixing it up, but when you have no skills or money that might take up all your energy and art wouldn't be in the priority line.

is there a place an artist can go live for a year and make art? is there a place that is large and i can be left the hell alone and bring all my stuff? tod can go off and find whatever it is he is supposed to be doing and then we can come back together and get our lives going? i dont know. we are trying to think of every possible solution. i know in europe they have this thing where you find an older person who has no children and needs cared for and you sign papers and be their caretaker and when they die you get their house. could i do that here somehow? do i have the time and patience to ignore my life to do that? at what cost am i willing to sacrifice my art for my life. or sacrifice my life for my art. i'm still waiting for that YES! feeling, not the take whatever you feel you can get even if it isn't what you want feeling.

we all have to make sacrifices i know that. i'm just waiting for that yes i want to do this feeling...the feeling i had when i left arizona with nothing but a carload of maps and camping gear. that feeling of yes i will live in vermont now and make art. i was scared shitless but excited. i didn't mind all the perceived negatives as compared to the positives. so far the negatives outweigh the positives. its just time. not only for me but for tod. he is over breathing in radiator fluid and nasty fumes being trapped in a cab all day. he is over living away from people and not having access to things happening, to chances to network and get started on something. he needs to be plugged in. and we need to get our lives going. i've been all over the united states and i can't for the life of me imagine where i can fit in and make it. i'm at a complete loss. i guess until i know i dont know. hopefully an ideal or an inkling turns us on before we blow.

mess

I told myself when I got to the halfway mark I would show a picture or two of a sliver of what I'm doing. I'm making two towers. They are going to be functional in a way, and they are going to be about 36" tall. They are probably going to make some people dizzy or nauseous when I actually post the finished products a few months from now (if all goes as planned). I started these pieces in Feb. and it is new. New territory. New messy. New learning. Nothing a gallery would show. Nothing 99% of the population would even enjoy, I could possibly loathe it as well, I don't know yet. From afar its cool. Closer it is mind clogging and possibly esophageal gagging. Super close and you see a world that only exists in fantasy. Escape routes....places to go and hide or find reflection. Because I'm a wimp I'm showing blips of 'clean'. Most of this is chaotic looking, although to me its all planned and things are placed purposefully....it still, I will grant it, looks to be just a splat of crap. Some of you have seen via emails, where I was at at inch 12, it keeps growing, keeps changing, stays busy and isn't getting any calmer. I'm at 18" now.

It's a relief in a way honestly. To allow myself to invest hundreds of hours into a mess. To focus on something that is just pure indulgence. I've never really done that with art. Granted most things I make start out as a 'who knows' but it is kept on a sort of line that I wont let go into crazy. I'm going crazy now. Know what, I take that back, I have done crazy indulgent before but it fell apart before it got finished. I've done it a few times with the puzzle pieces and have to say when you spend so much time gluing piece after piece all to have it fall apart or not work out, lets just say you aren't too eager to get back on the horse immediately. It can feel like a complete waste of time and material. I'm all in though on this one. I could still screw it up, if one can screw something up that is experimental.

Other than that....etsy. I'm doing the treasury thing. Vilte showed me that the code can be cracked if one just has persistence. My clocks might be a little expensive and out there for most etsians but dammit if I don't try I wont know.

Other than that I'm out there virtually, running like an animal in galleries, in cities, in studios and foreclosed homes for sale. I'm exposing my tight little head to as much as I can and hoping something cracks it open. Sometimes your being just knows if something doesn't change it will die. Your being knows that it's time even if your head is unwilling to fathom the reality of a complete upsidedown of reality. Just the exposure has got to be good....just entertaining the possibility of being open to anything. Forget the poverty. Forget the panic attacks. Forget the loads of art stuff and the obvious impossibility....right?

I need help

I have a hard time understanding things....and one thing I don't get is when it comes to art funding. When I go look online for art grants etc I often see things like this:

To become a USA Fellow, one must be nominated. Each year nominations are made by an anonymous group of arts leaders, critics, scholars, and artists chosen by USA. Nominators do not know one another; their identities remain confidential. (I found that here).

Can someone explain to me if I ever have a chance of getting nominated when I know NO ONE? Does anyone have thoughts or advice on grants for living space etc? If you are a full time artist who needs help what do you do? Am I even close to being in a world where I would be considered for grants and help?

Vilte shawl give away on Ravenhill

Wanted to send people off to a blog that is having a shawl giveaway from felter Vilte. Ravenhill is the blog, and you have four chances to win. I envy whoever wins a shawl! I recently wrote a post about Vilte here, I found her work when I made a treasury in Etsy and since then she has put my clocks in well over a dozen treasuries!

Even if I never sell to a complete stranger on Etsy, just meeting Vilte has made etsy worth it as she has become a friend as well as a beacon of inspiration in so many ways.

I had never even looked at felt work before, let alone had any clue about the process involved. My eyes have been opened and I have a new appreciation for a completely different kind of work. On her blog there are a few links to artist works in felt that blow my mind (the fashioning felt 2 video is amazing).

For as minimalistic as I am, for as shoddily as I dress....I fantasize about one day owning a shawl by Vilte. Her work transforms and lifts me up every time I look at it.

the other side of the coin

This is my current screen saver picture. I took this picture when I was camping in Vermont and didn't even know that this is where I would finally stop and start to make art. I was camping in the Green Mountains and on my 2nd or 3rd day saw this house and felt like I had just found an exotic dying creature. I'm always a little thrilled when I see this picture. Unfortunately I only had a 3 mega pixel camera and didn't know I would be making art, let alone art with photography. This house is long gone but I have the image and it does print out as an 8x10 so it's there when I want it.

So I've been walking a fair amount in nature, thinking about forgetting my own personal limitations, what do I want? I wonder about artists and their inspiration and how they do what they do. I need to walk in nature on a weekly basis, daily when I'm at the top of my game. I don't get inspiration from nature as much as I get a sense of having meditated. Taking a bath in complete darkness also does it. My mind sends me flashes of how I could do something or even what I could do. I'm not consciously thinking about art and then suddenly, like one of those nanosecond subliminal messages you hear about being flashed at some unsuspecting viewer, I get a flash and then I know what to do. A problem is solved and I can resume my work. I guess that is inspiration but not in the way one thinks. Looking at a flower or trees never infuses me with direct ideas for art making. I don't even know where my ideas come from.

So I know I need to live where I can easily/always access getting away and walking on a path. I did it in Arizona and that winter I lived in Minneapolis. I do it here. Where ever else I go I have to live very close to trails.

In an ideal world I would have a studio built on the same land I live on. If I lived in an artists loft I would have a hard time lugging scrap in. And where and how would I wash it? Where and how would I cut metal and wood? Who could stand the dirt and noise? I also realized I'm not the kind of artist who wants to have a place to go to. I work a little and go do something else. Things need to 'bake'. They need to sit and rise and rest while I get my mind wrapped around it. I like popping into my studio across the stairway hallway and doing something then popping out and exercising or cooking or whatever. I like being close to my work at all times as I never know when the ideas will come and the desire to do will overpower me.

So I have the two things I need. My work is here and I live a stone's throw from miles and miles of trails. It isn't perfect but I guess every day I have to accept that for someone who has nothing I have a lot.

I'm picking tod up tonight. I am also grateful that I have someone who loves my art and I can share what I'm doing and even bounce ideas off of or borrow two extra biceps when I can't do something on my own. For as much as I like being alone, I couldn't ask for a better friend to share my life and my art with. After all, making art is a two part deal for me. There is the doing and then the sharing. If I made all of this and no one ever saw it the energy would turn against itself and go bad. So for as much as I feel I'm going to go crazy if things don't change, I do recognize what I have.

it is what it is

I've had a good chunk of time to myself and it all comes to an end today. The house owners come and Tod, who has been on his own vacation also comes back this weekend. Other than dealing with interruptions from the gardener, which I am never prepared for and always agitated by, I've had some good time with me and my art. I've got things in my 'currently working on folder'. I've got new things in my 'furniture' folder. I've got things in my 'clocks' folder. It's been productive on many levels and I cannot tell you how nice it is to just be alone day in and day out and not have to talk to anyone. Yes I miss tod but his absence has just shown me how badly we need to get our lives going so we can live with more space and less interruption. I know if I had my own studio I would soar. It's easy to say if only....but I feel it. It's obvious to me how much different my working schedule is when I'm alone vs. cramped in this small space with tod. I get up early and he gets up late, so we both have hours of time we have to be quiet for the other. Even when I'm alone here I don't have enough space. I've got shit everywhere. I'll have to stuff it all back into the dark dank basement. I hate going in there, it feels like punishment.

Tod doesn't have space either to do the things he wants to do. We think and talk about this all the time lately and it feels like we are banging our heads against a wall. Life is a strange thing. Sometimes it is just not obvious AT ALL what you are supposed to do. Where you are supposed to go. We are both at a complete blank. Do we take what little money he has saved and just go somewhere, anywhere? Do we stay here and keep living rent free as long as we can, living on borrowed time as the threat of selling comes and goes every few months...keep living in a space that allows us to live for free but not freely. And if we move, we couldn't afford a shack....I'd have to find a job and I don't seem to be able to function so hot out there. If I could I would. I'm tired of making myself feel bad for being who I am. I'm tired of feeling like I'm not normal because I cannot tolerate a job that kills my soul or my mind or my body.

And then, I just have to let go of my tail and stop turning in circles that go nowhere. Back to art. It's the only thing I know how to do now. It is the only thing I want to do. I have no clue and the universe isn't exactly plopping anything down in front of us. I would like to think that one day an inkling will come to us. I know there is a time to DO and a time to WAIT. And sometimes you have to just do SOMETHING. It is a complete void out there. The idea of moving to detroit and buying a denuded home and starting from scratch is the only thing that appeals to me, but I am deterred by not having any money to then fix up said house to make it livable. And honestly, all I own is my art and tools and computer....am I going to move somewhere that is guaranteed to be burglarized and have what little I own and cannot replace, taken? And I still like Vermont....but damn it is a hard nut to crack. Maybe I'm the nut and I'm already cracked.

whats your opinion?

I'm stuck and I can't stand it anymore. Meaning, I've been looking at this mock put together for MONTHS and it's gonna either get made or not. This is just two photos, the one in the middle I would float mount 1 or 2 inches onto the larger one. The larger photo is a bit blurry so the front one pops out more. I like the concept. I like it but I'm not sure about it and I'm wanting some feedback. I don't normally do this but I've been looking at this for so long I don't even know anymore.

It's different than my other mixed media photo pieces, as I wouldn't do anything else to it. No baubles. No border....just a simple double photo, both are already laminated onto the quarter inch MDF board, both have a beveled black frame which you can't really see too well in this picture. It's simple. It's also kinda of floral or chaotic....I can see it in a certain kind of home but not sure that kind of buyer would EVER find me. What do you think? thumbs up or thumbs down?

I've used this photo before, you can see it here.

Feeling Functional

I know, you have seen these pieces before but I recently took new and improved bigger better photos of the two hay shelves and I wanted to share their beauty! I recently got the table below posted on notcot.org (which boosted my web page viewing nearly ten fold), and that if you include my coffee table I appear to have a small table collection starting to form.

No surprise, I have two more tables in the making. One is fairly simple but of course technically I will be struggling for god knows how long. Yesterday proved to be a day of tantrums when after searching for a socket wrench in vain, and trying to come up with a solution to skip the need for said socket wrench I instead started work on the second idea. It started as a chair idea and by nighttime as I lay in bed drawing out how I might want this to go I found it turning into a table. Which then made total sense as I continue to feel drawn to functional art and already have a few tables completed. I'm going to be a table queen, just you watch.

Francois Royer: Stanker

How can you not like something called 'Stanker'? When I saw the piece above on The Alternative Consumer, my mouth dropped open and I rushed to his website to see more. Then I emailed Francois to ask if I could blog about his work.

Here is an excerpt from his PDF about page:

In November 2003, in the narrow hallway of a Paris basement that served as his studio, Francois Royer created the first Stanker from an old oil barrel and the wheels of a supermarket caddy. His intention was to make a sort of furniture on wheels - but especially to rid the school where he was an art teacher of an impressive pile of metallic junk that had accumulated over the years.

Impressive is an understatement, these works are priceless jewels of invention. Who can take something so useless and toxic and make beautiful, fun, functional works of art? I actually feel excited and giddy every time I look at them. This is art that has life and purpose!

I asked Francois a few questions, there is a slight language barrier as I do not speak French, luckily for me he speaks a bit of English. Here is our exchange:

(P) I'm curious about the process of just cleaning those barrels, I'm sure some of them are very toxic and nasty.

(F) well it's a dirty job but someones got to do it ;-) I use sawdust, sand, solvents, wear rubber gloves and pinch my nose

(P) And like any other material, do you feel that each barrel has its own possibility...is that what speaks to you or do you have the idea and just use any barrel?

(F) both of them. But most of the time I have the idea first. It's getting harder to find drums with particular shape, like one of my last ones BB06/lemmy.

(P) What is one of your favorite pieces and why?

(F) definitely the next one. It's a never ending challenge to create a new piece from the same old steel cylinder

(P) do you have help working on these or is this a one man operation?

(F) I work alone. It's my second job. First one is art teacher.

(P) I'm curious, your fabrication process and skills, maybe the first piece you ever made from a barrel.

(F) From getting the drum to finishings the process of the work is quite long but classical : I have to clean up the drum, strip it, brush it, cut it, make the wooden parts, assembly everything, then paint, varnish or waxen and polish... I don't make a lot of sketches before, ideas come easily, most of the times from my imagination or background.




I have so much admiration for this work. It is rare that I feel total excitement when I look at art, Stanker has taken hold of my heart. I am inspired and jealous. This work is raw, exciting, totally unconventional and reaches out to viewers on so many levels you can't not at least marvel or smile when you see what a beautiful transformation these barrels have gone through.

This 75 Piece Collection is being exhibited at the Kreyol Factory April 7 - July 5 at the Grande Halle De La Vittette in Paris. More info here. Take a closer look at what the barrels look like before they are made into masterpieces. You can read more about Francios here.

I'm a minimalist but I would live with a few Stankers in a heartbeat. Who needs conventional when you can have THIS! Best to you Francois ~ hope its a sellout show!

destruction and resurrection

yep, another clock. this one is #86. fourteen more and i'm done with the series. i thought i might whip through these but now i'm not so sure. I don't multi task well, when i'm working on one project its difficult for me to trot over to another one and pick up where i left off.

the puzzle project is laborious, so far i'm on month four of it and i think it will be 3 or 4 more months before i'm done. i do hope i'm able to find a way to feel motivated to do something else too.

take this clock. last week i had all these tiles glued onto it and spent 4 days trying to get the fricking hands to 'go with it'. no color worked. what i did was instead put a little cloth over all 34 tiles and beat the living shit out of them with a hammer. a day later i then scraped them all off and cleaned up the plate. i kept the color that i had painted (adding to it just a little) on the top and bottom and finally found some metal to cut up and fit in the center. the hands are a bit greyer and lighter in shade....for the life of me i can never get good photos of my artwork. after 3 hours of dicking around with picture taking and editing i give up. this piece reminds me of an abandoned car out in the desert. i think it is quite attractive in real life. you'll just have to buy it to see for yourself.

stowe police blotter

just reflecting on how nice it is to live in a fairly 'simple' town.
the one about the bat on the recreation path is ridiculous.

Total incidents: 64
Total tickets: 2
Total warnings: 25
From recent reports:

April 20, a Morrisville woman brought in a captured bat that had flown into her house and around her children’s bedroom, police said. The bat was tested, and did not have rabies, police said.

April 20, ---------------- reported a house on Sugar House Road in Stowe had been vandalized. Its windows appeared to have been shot out with a BB gun, police said.

April 20, police were called about a bat that appeared to be injured and was lying in the middle of the Stowe Recreation Path. Police moved the bat to the side of the path and it flew away.

April 20, Blazer Transportation reported it had received a bad check in the amount of $465.

April 20, residents reported a porcupine wandering around Trapp Hill Road. The porcupine did not appear to be rabid, police said.

April 21, loose cows were wandering loose on Tinker Lane in Stowe. They were corralled and brought back to their owner.

April 21, a driver left Maplefields convenience store without paying for $25 worth of gasoline. Police found the driver, who went back and paid, police said.

April 21, -------------, 27, of Waterbury was arrested on a warrant.

April 21, the manager of the Pines Motel reported smelling marijuana coming from one of the motel rooms. Police did not find anything.

April 22, residents reported that children were shooting a bow and arrow on Holmes Lane.

April 23, a former resident left a cat at the Pines Motel. Police took the animal to the North Country Animal League.

April 24, a gold watch was found on Park Street and turned in to police.

April 25, -----------------, of Stowe was charged with driving under the influence.

April 25, -----------------, of Morrisville was charged with driving under the influence.

April 27,------------------- of Morrisville was charged with violating his conditions of release.

Hamtramck Michigan

Mitch Cope and Gina Reichert in my humble opinion are pioneers. I've been reading about them for well over a month now and it all started with an article in the New York Times, 'For Sale the $100 house'.

They have started The Power House Project as well as Design 99. In my words, the power house project is about making affordable housing available. A community of artistic people. Conscientious people, people who want to create a neighborhood of off the grid living in an already used and abused neighborhood that has turned into a suburban wasteland. Here is the 'about' page, which will tell you in their words what the project is.

The Power House Report is their blog about the neighborhood they are living in, the progress of the house and in general a unique view of a seemingly painful yet obvious metamorphosis in an upward direction. I have to admit, I don't know if I would have the courage to live there right now. I'm not sure I would want to constantly worry about having my tools, art, personal things stolen or my house burnt down. But what am I really doing right now? Hiding out (I like to think I'm healing and resting here but at some point don't I have to get on with it?) in Vermont, living a fairly safe and undisturbed existence. Not being involved with anything or anyone. Breathing clean air and living a rather unchallenged life.

I remember what it's like to live in a scary city. Hearing gunshots at night. Having my vehicle broken into more than once. Dealing with unruly neighbors that chased each other down the street with frying pans while screaming obscenities in the middle of the night or doing their drug deals literally 20 feet from my front door. Being afraid to walk or drive through certain areas and seeing the dregs of society scaring off anything good. It sucked. I hated being afraid, feeling unsafe, having bars over my windows and doors and always looking over my shoulder.

So, why am I writing about this? I find myself drawn to these people and this place. Yeah it has been done throughout history, artists seeping into the forgotten neighborhoods and revitalizing it. The Soho Effect, artists moving into areas that no one else wants to live in. Restaurants follow, gentrification begins. Artists can't afford to stay and move on. I think the Power House Project just might be a way for artists to flow to an area and not be pushed out when things get 'nice' again. If they are able to create this area of artists owning homes, self sustainable homes and form a tight community of people not needing new this and that that perhaps they will have a survival rate that supersedes what has previously proven to be a disaster for most artists. That excites me. I have this fantasy that I would love to be there tearing things down, ripping crap up and learning how to rebuild things. Being around other artists that want to create a self sustainable neighborhood sounds like my idea of Utopia.

While it's true you can get a house for next to nothing there, you are also going to have nothing to show for it but possibility. Many of these homes have been visited by scrappers. You will get a plot of land and an empty shell, or a house that needs so much work you might as well tear it down and start all over. And I don't know squat about building a home, let alone how I would even get the money to get something started. But that doesn't stop me from observing and wondering. It doesn't stop me from collecting more information and possibly visiting one day and seeing if I am even attracted to this in real life. It doesn't stop me from rooting them on from afar. If anything my mind is being opened and exposed to possibility and that is a good thing. I don't know these people, I don't know what it is really like there, I don't know how I would ever physically or mentally handle it (I still panic just taxi driving tourists in vermont for gods sake), but I know that I am attracted to the energy of what is happening there. If nothing else I can spread the word.

Check out Detroit book of love, a collaboration of seven contemporary photographers, including Mitch Cope. His drawings (links on the sidebar) are worth a look too!

I won something!

Two weeks ago Gigi and Sandra had a blog giveaway of their 4x2 project book. I was the lucky recipient! I got it in the mail a few days ago and wanted to express my thanks and share it here.

The entire book is composed of Gigi's work is on the left and Sandra's on the right. These two friends wanted to: 'collaborate on a creative project that held both visual and seasonal interest. Something with a combination of substance, spontaneity and delight, and something that had no rules. We decided to go with the first idea that came to us organically selecting one month from each season in one year to document the transitions reflecting that period in time.'

Their goal was to record what they experienced in the four seasons, in their everyday lives and put it side by side. The result is 92 pages of colorful, tactile, moody, dreamy images that tell a visual story which instantly connects me to nature and life.


On a creative and technical level, this this book is very well done! Gigi and Sandra made the book via blurb.com and I am very impressed with the look and feel of it. I would totally recommend this site to other artists interested in making their own book! I am so pleased to own a copy, especially since I have known Gigi (aka the roadsidescholar) for most of my blogging life. I've enjoyed watching her journey as a photographer which makes this book all the more precious to me. Thank you for the gift give away ladies, best to you both!

Sandcastle #85/100

Sometimes a clock just has to look simple. I've spent two weeks superimposing different baubles onto the base of this clock and nothing works. Funny how it is the negative words that always echo in my head ~ two years ago a friend put my links onto her myspace page and mentioned my clocks, trying to get the word out. Some guy said, 'yeah she just puts auto junk on something and calls it art, big deal anyone can do that'.

I've never forgotten seeing that comment; those words bellow at me when I think I've finished a piece. But after spending days and days trying to get the clock hands the right color (these are a light cream, not something discernible in the photo), getting the right color of paint to match my 'junk', and spending absurd amounts of time deciding what if any center piece to use, I know that it isnt as easy as just putting a thing on a thing and saying done. By nature I have always tended towards complicated, allowing things to be 'simple' is a huge challenge at times but in the end feels better to my eye.

I suppose even if it were that simple, so what. If I have to defend my creativity I'm in the wrong business.